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Marriage question follow-up?

 Submitted: 7/12/2007
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Question: Third parties have been involved in this marriage consistently; it works for a day and then degenerate again. The wife says she is in love with someone else - someone whom she thinks she should have married in the first place, she goes around and complains about her husband creating discord amongst members, she openly disrespects her husband and tears him down verbally; members in the assembly are concerned and if one isn't rooted and grounded in God then you don't wish to listen to your elders, the scripture states he should rule his own household well and from all accounts that's not happenning. Divorce is never an option, so where do we go from here? We are still fasting and praying about this; we know it's unbecoming behavior for the body of Christ.
Answer: For a marriage to work out, there must be two willing parties. In certain situations, one party is willing to do whatever is necessary, but the other will simply not cooperate. This should not necessarily disqualify the willing party from a leadership role. We admit, however, that it doesn't look good when an elder of the assembly has a wife who is so out of control. But this is where the leaders must carefully evaluate the situation and do what is in the best interests of the assembly as a whole. We believe that the best solution would be for the elder to voluntarily step down for a while to focus his attention exclusively on saving his marriage and to avoid any disrepute coming upon the leadership of the church. Paul gave wise counsel in 2 Corinthians 6:3 when he wrote, 'We give no offense in anything, that our ministry may not be blamed.'


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